2009, June 07, Thursday
Immanuel had gone to catch a movie with his godfather. To him these are the few outings he live for, to get away from home and enjoy. It's sad that unlike the cousin sisters, my boys have no family besides, this uncle and his family. It's pathetic how grown ups, can be so childish. Just because they can't handle you being different, they ostracize you. But what these cruel people never thought about were the children. The poor boys are going to grow up to despise them.
Usually, Ivan is never invited out by anyone, and that's sad. They all deem him difficult and never bother to try. Personally, I think about it and wonder how hard a trip to MacDonald's and a cup of Hot Fudge Sundae would be? My hubby and I tried persuading the family to try but the easy way out would be, "I don't think so." Previously, Ivan was young and never really cared, but I still brought him out to avoid feeling left out, whenever the brother had such outings.
I can't tell for sure when he realized, that he was never invited by uncles and aunties. But a couple of weeks ago, during the school holidays. My mum came over and invited Immanuel to follow her out. Ivan hear the conversation and saw them leaving. As we sat together cuddled up after "Tickle Time" (one of our daily rituals). I asked Ivan where his father was and where his brother was. He would normally not answer, but on this day he did. He said, "Daddy go work.... Immanuel go out with Amma ." Oh boy, he understood it. When they came come after their outing, my mum went over to Ivan to pass him a donut. He refused her and ignored her. She told it was one of his autistic traits, but I realized that there was more to it. I asked Ivan why he was moody and why he didn't want the donut. He said, "Amma go out with Immanuel". My mother was so shocked and I think it struck a nerve. She tried for the next week to befriend Ivan, to get into his good books. After two days and lots of sugar pastries, he forgave her and stopped ignoring her.
My little boy is growing up, growing up his own way. It different from the rest of the world but he is not a little child any more.
So, after Immanuel left, there was silence in the house, as he is the chatty one. With Ivan its just humming and tunes of the Warner Bros. sung over and over again. Later that afternoon, I brought Ivan out to Sun Plaza. He made so many decisions today. I asked if he wanted burger or pasta. He chose Pasta. Then I asked which pasta he wanted. He peered at the huge menu on the side and pointed to a dish and read it out saying Tortellini.
We sat down and our dishes arrived at the same time Immanuel and his godfather arrived. I started talking to him and didn't feed Ivan this time around. Normally when the dish came I would cut it into two and start feeding him. But I soon realized that he was almost done with the dish. Ahhh...life seemed like it was so simple. We could now have a meal together, without me having to multitask.
Okay, we had a good meal and returned home. Immanuel was very busy with his new Star Wars toy, while Ivan got a new Tweety and Tasmanian Devil. As the boys were busy with their stuff, I saw baby Jaden crying. (my very cute, 1yrs plus, next door neighbour). Normally, I would call him in a offer some chocolates. This time when, I did that, he didn't want to leave. He decided to stay awhile. So he walked around, went into the TV room where Ivan was playing said hi and walked around more. I took out some old toys from the storeroom for the little boy to play. These were Immanuel's old toys. Ivan never took fancy for them. There were cars, trucks, planes and bikes.
Little Jaden played with the cars, while his brother JC played with Immanuel, the Star Wars toys. Its surprising that Immanuel so willingly shared his new toys with his neighbours. He used to be a hoarder when he was younger. Good to know that he has outgrown that habit.
After the boys left, I told my boys to ensure that every toy went back to it proper place. I had gone to take my shower and was surprise with Ivan when I came out. He had set up the train track, and the train compartments. He also had arranged the toy cars around his toy house, as if they were parked outside.
He spent the rest of the day, watching the train go round and around and around. He had gone into my room, dragged out the foldable, wooden table and placed it in the TV room. He had set up the train station. Ah... the creative juices are beginning to flow. He is actually participating in "Pretend Play".
Usually, Ivan is never invited out by anyone, and that's sad. They all deem him difficult and never bother to try. Personally, I think about it and wonder how hard a trip to MacDonald's and a cup of Hot Fudge Sundae would be? My hubby and I tried persuading the family to try but the easy way out would be, "I don't think so." Previously, Ivan was young and never really cared, but I still brought him out to avoid feeling left out, whenever the brother had such outings.
I can't tell for sure when he realized, that he was never invited by uncles and aunties. But a couple of weeks ago, during the school holidays. My mum came over and invited Immanuel to follow her out. Ivan hear the conversation and saw them leaving. As we sat together cuddled up after "Tickle Time" (one of our daily rituals). I asked Ivan where his father was and where his brother was. He would normally not answer, but on this day he did. He said, "Daddy go work.... Immanuel go out with Amma ." Oh boy, he understood it. When they came come after their outing, my mum went over to Ivan to pass him a donut. He refused her and ignored her. She told it was one of his autistic traits, but I realized that there was more to it. I asked Ivan why he was moody and why he didn't want the donut. He said, "Amma go out with Immanuel". My mother was so shocked and I think it struck a nerve. She tried for the next week to befriend Ivan, to get into his good books. After two days and lots of sugar pastries, he forgave her and stopped ignoring her.
My little boy is growing up, growing up his own way. It different from the rest of the world but he is not a little child any more.
So, after Immanuel left, there was silence in the house, as he is the chatty one. With Ivan its just humming and tunes of the Warner Bros. sung over and over again. Later that afternoon, I brought Ivan out to Sun Plaza. He made so many decisions today. I asked if he wanted burger or pasta. He chose Pasta. Then I asked which pasta he wanted. He peered at the huge menu on the side and pointed to a dish and read it out saying Tortellini.
We sat down and our dishes arrived at the same time Immanuel and his godfather arrived. I started talking to him and didn't feed Ivan this time around. Normally when the dish came I would cut it into two and start feeding him. But I soon realized that he was almost done with the dish. Ahhh...life seemed like it was so simple. We could now have a meal together, without me having to multitask.
Okay, we had a good meal and returned home. Immanuel was very busy with his new Star Wars toy, while Ivan got a new Tweety and Tasmanian Devil. As the boys were busy with their stuff, I saw baby Jaden crying. (my very cute, 1yrs plus, next door neighbour). Normally, I would call him in a offer some chocolates. This time when, I did that, he didn't want to leave. He decided to stay awhile. So he walked around, went into the TV room where Ivan was playing said hi and walked around more. I took out some old toys from the storeroom for the little boy to play. These were Immanuel's old toys. Ivan never took fancy for them. There were cars, trucks, planes and bikes.
Little Jaden played with the cars, while his brother JC played with Immanuel, the Star Wars toys. Its surprising that Immanuel so willingly shared his new toys with his neighbours. He used to be a hoarder when he was younger. Good to know that he has outgrown that habit.
After the boys left, I told my boys to ensure that every toy went back to it proper place. I had gone to take my shower and was surprise with Ivan when I came out. He had set up the train track, and the train compartments. He also had arranged the toy cars around his toy house, as if they were parked outside.
He spent the rest of the day, watching the train go round and around and around. He had gone into my room, dragged out the foldable, wooden table and placed it in the TV room. He had set up the train station. Ah... the creative juices are beginning to flow. He is actually participating in "Pretend Play".
-bittersweetz-
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