dear diary

This morning I got up with butterflies in my tummy. I am really too anxious, about going to the dentist. I just hate it. The first time I had to remove my wisdom tooth, my mum lived in the next block from the dental clinic, I could just go over to rest and recover. Years later, when I had to remove my second wisdom tooth, I was already settled in Sembawang. My darling hubby, took me to the dental clinic in a cab and took me home in a cab. After which he took care of me as I slept through the anguish of the void in my gums.

But now, he is away at work abroad, and I have to face this alone. (boo-hoo) I mentioned to my mum last night on a phone conversation that I needed to get my tooth extracted, probably next week... and there was no reaction... I had made plans to accompany my sis to get maternity clothes, but had to reschedule as my tooth was bugging me. I sms her that I had to visit the dentist, due to the discomfort, and she apparently had nothing to say. That's my family for you. Sometimes, I hurts to know that when push comes to shuff, at the end of the day money is your only relative.

To my best memory, I had always been there for my mum, and all her check ups. All her hospital stay ins, etc, etc, etc. And as for my sis, she knows that when she needs me I am there. But unfortunately, I always knew that I stood alone when I needed someone. It's been like this all my life. I never had anyone to rely on, I believe that's why I am the way I am because of this. It's hard looking over your shoulder all the time, not being to trust anyone, or rely on anyone. Thankfully, the good Lord threw me down a blessing, in the form of my hubby. He is not perfect, but he has been there for me, whenever I needed him.

Any how, with a heavy heart, and the Lord by my side, I headed to the dentist. I awaited anxiously. The dentist then told me that I had an infection and had to be on antibiotics. And to return next week to have it extracted. I guess that's a relief for now, as I have to throw a Halloween party this Sunday.

After the clinic, I went to visit my God-daughters. Had a little chit chat with the sis-in law, and left to meet Immanuel for lunch at McDonald's. From there we went to Sim Lim Square, to pick up Immanuel's Wii. We were early, so we walked around and had a good mother-son talk.

I had needed to warn Immanuel, about his friend, who seem to be a little off. I had noticed that when I was talking to him yesterday, he kept staring at my boobs. My fear is that because if being neglected, that boy could search for inappropriate distractions, like pron. I wanted Immanuel to know that he can come and talk to me about anything. He later opened up and mentioned, about how that friend of his had been wanting to enter a sex shop. Oh all that growing up, not that fun.

We had reached home, and his friend was already at our place waiting for us.  They tried out the new game and were having lots of fun. I took my painkillers and rested awhile.

xoxo